The Short Vort by Rabbi Eisenman

Recently, a woman wrote to me asking how she could properly address the following issue.

She has many family members in Israel, including one who is on the front lines.

She told me that she feels hurt when she meets people she knows and they don't inquire about the well-being of her family members.

She knows that their seeming indifference to her plight is not intentional; however, she wants to understand how to avoid feeling slighted or developing a negative attitude toward these individuals.

Her question resonated with me greatly.

As a father with three married children and the majority of my grandchildren in Israel, her words penetrated deep into my heart.

Having a son who was called up at 4 AM last Friday and is now also on the front lines caused her words to resonate with me very personally.

Her pain was my pain.

I am well aware that others have married children in Israel.

I am also aware that there are others with children and/or grandchildren on the front lines.

However, the majority of the residents of Orthodox America, while many have relatives in Israel, only a minority have a married child serving on the frontlines.

And, I must confess, although I attempted to answer this woman with the thought that those who did not inquire certainly meant no harm, nevertheless, in truth, I too felt the loneliness and the lack of understanding of others to her plight.

Of course, we know that we are all connected, and we are all well aware of the Torah principle that we are all responsible for one another (Kol Yisroel Areivim Zeh L'Zeh).

Nonetheless, Hashem, in His kindness, allows those not directly impacted by the pain to be less affected than those directly impacted.

Meaning we all feel the pain of others. However, thankfully, those not directly impacted are usually not as paralyzed by the pain as those who are directly affected.

If we were all affected the same way, there would be no one around to comfort others.

Therefore, Hashem wants us to feel the pain of others, yet we must recognize that it's also Hashem's kindness that enables us to distance ourselves to a certain degree in order to help those directly impacted.

However, the Nisyaon or challenge for us not impacted- is to attempt to feel as much as we can the difficulties others are experiencing.

Only by doing our best to feel the pain of our brothers and sisters can we properly respond and perhaps ease their burden.

Therefore, I cannot fault anyone for not being able to empathize with those who are in Israel and those who have close family members there.

However, that does not excuse us from doing our best to feel their pain.

Therefore, permit me, as the proud father or a holy soldier serving in the IDF and as the father and grandchildren of three families living there, to present some of their experiences over the last week.

I do so to sensitize myself and perhaps you as well.

Please also remember that although they are facing challenges, not one would consider changing places with anyone in America for a moment.

They are thrilled and feel privileged to live in the Garden of Hashem.

Nevertheless, we should all try to feel their challenges so that we, too, can daven properly and attempt to do what we can for them.

Today, at 9 AM (Israel time), I was speaking to one of my sons. He was shopping for some last-minute Shabbos needs.

Suddenly, he said, "Ta, I have to go; there is a siren. They are about to bomb. I have one and a half minutes to get to a shelter."

Thankfully, he was able to reach a protected area and was safe.

However, this incident illustrates the constant threat that our brothers and sisters in Israel are facing daily.

Here are some examples which my family has shared with me from the past week.

The Bas Mitzvah

One granddaughter, whose Bas Mitzvah is in the month of Sivan, was scheduled to have a celebration in school.

All the girls in her class who were becoming Bas Mitzvah in Sivan were going to come to school on Friday in their Shabbos dresses, and the class would dance and sing together.

On Thursday evening, before going to sleep, she prepared her Shabbos dress and looked forward to wearing it to school on Friday morning.

Yet, there was no school on Friday, and there has not been one the entire time of the war.

As school is coming to an end, it appears that there will be no Bas Mitzvah party at school.

Bathing

The mothers are discussing when to bathe the children at night.

Are the chances of the sirens going off greater before you bathe the kids, and you might as well wait?

Or perhaps they won't be bombing until later, and it would be better to bathe now?

Sleeping in the Mamad (safe room).



Any Israeli apartments or homes built in the last thirty years have a Mamad- a reinforced security room designed to protect people from missile strikes, drone attacks, and other threats.

For the last week, most children in Israel and many adults have been sleeping in their Mamad.

Those who don't sleep there have been woken up two or three times a night and then crowd in with their children to the Mamad.

Those who live in older buildings are often forced to dress and utilize public shelters located on the street.

The mamad, which is usually the size of a small room, can be quite claustrophobic when a large family is forced to be there, making sleep impossible.

The sale of tranquilizers has increased dramatically over the past week.

Economic Impact

Most non-essential businesses have closed.

The entire Israeli tourism sector has been shut down.

The Israeli tourism sector contributed $444.3 billion to Israel's GDP last year and supported 238,000 jobs, representing nearly one in five jobs across the country.

All of those 238,000 jobs are now inactive.

This includes tour guides, restaurants, hotels, and many other aspects of society.

Schools-Soldiers

Schools are closed, causing already sleep-deprived parents and children to be even more on edge and anxious.

And, of course, thousands of troops have been called up, which leads to added stress on the families whose fathers, sons, and even grandfathers are no longer at home.

In short, we here, far away from the conflict, should attempt to feel the pain of our brethren in Israel.

We should be sensitive to those in our community who have family members living there and especially sensitive to those with children serving in the IDF.

We must do our best to realize that, as steadfast as our brethren are in their Bitachon and in their love of Eretz Yisroel, they are nevertheless facing difficult and painful challenges. It behooves us to recognize their pain.

Please say your Tehilim with even Kavanah.

Try to avoid Machlokes and strife with others.

Increase your Tzedakah, especially to those organizations that are helping our brethren in Israel.

And finally, if you see me in Shul or anywhere, please forgive me if I  appear not as cheerful as usual.

I apologize in advance.

However, please be understanding, as I have a great load on my heart.