The Short Vort by Rabbi Eisenman

Recently I was told about an incident that occurred in a local Shul.

The source of the story is impeccable; therefore, I do not doubt its veracity.

It seems that after the COVID crisis had passed, the Shul reopened.

However,  the older veteran-gabbai, could not resume his duties as he was told by his doctors not to return to Shul due to his compromised immune condition.

The question, therefore, was who to appoint as the new gabbai.

After consulting with great Talmedei Chochomim and his Rebbeim, the rabbi appointed his brother to be the gabbai.

His brother was very qualified for the position, and most Shul was delighted with the rabbi’s decision.

Unfortunately, as things sometimes go in Shuls, a small group of disgruntled congregants created a Machlokes against the rabbi and his brother.

One man, in particular, Mr. Bald, was enraged by the rabbi’s choice as he felt he was next in line to become the gabbai.

Mr. Bald riled up some other bitter congregants and decided to foment an outright rebellion against the rabbi.

Mr. Bald was planning a public protest outside the Shul.

He claimed the rabbi acted out of nepotism when he appointed his brother the gabbai.

There was a real danger to the unity of the Shul.

Mr. Bald approached his friend Mr. Benpeles to join the rebellion.

Mr. Benpeles, who everyone called “Oan,” was delighted to join the fray.

(Mr. Benpeles had once owned an auto-body shop that used to be owned by a man named Coan. However, the letter “c” had fallen off the sign years ago, and everyone referred to Benpeles as “Oan’.)

On the appointed day of the public protest against the rabbi and his brother, Mr. Bald, made sure all of his supporters were present.

He had managed to convince 250 congregants to join him!

Benpeles was sitting in his home when he told his wife, “Today is the big day when we get to unseat the rabbi and his brother! I am so excited! This rebellion will be successful!”

Mrs. Benpeles was a very creative and imaginative woman. She realized the futility of the rebellion, and she also learned how the entire sedition was destructive to the Kehilla.

She knew that there was nothing worse than Machlokes among the Jewish people.

She pleaded with her husband not to attend the planned insurgency. However, he said he had already given Mr. Bald his word and could not go back on his word.

Mrs. Benpeles said, “Fine. However, it would help if you ate lunch first.

She prepared lunch, and before the food, she mentioned that she had some fine wine that she wanted to try.

She gave her husband a cup of wine, and he enjoyed it.

 Soon she gave him another glass of wine and another until Benpeles said, “I am a little tipsy. I need a nap.” Mrs. Benpeles readily agreed, and soon Oan was fast asleep in bed.

A few minutes later, Mrs. Benpeles heard the mob of dissenters nearing her home.

She quickly went out on the porch of her home.

Unbelievably as it sounds (however, I know for sure this is true!), she removed her sheitel, and in open view of all, she sat with her natural hair in full display for all to see.

When the mob approached the door and saw Mrs. Benpeles in a state of compromised modesty, they made a quick about-face and turned on their heels in embarrassment.

The pack continued their rebellion until they were vanquished, and disappeared from the world.

The only original rabble member saved was Oan Benpeles due to his wife’s ingenuity.

When the rabbi heard about the actions of Mrs. Benpeles and how she compromised her modesty to save her husband from joining the machlokes, he said about her, “The wisest of women builds her house” (Mishlei 14:1).

The rabbi explained that machlokes and disunity are the worst sins possible.

Mrs. Benpeles acted appropriately and exemplary when she removed her sheitel, for there is nothing worse than strife and machlokes.

Think about that.