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The Short Vort- - “Who am I? ” (8/18/10)
The Short Vort
Good Morning!
Today is Wednesday the 8th of Elul 5770 and August 18, 2010
Who am I?
One day I gave in my car to a mechanic to have work done.
The garage was a Latino establishment and I struggled to make myself understood to the fellow who was dealing with me.
The place was run very ‘heimishe’ and there was no paper work to be filled out. As I gave him the keys to my car, he said, “Amigo, Call me later in the afternoon.”
That afternoon I called him back and I asked him if my car was ready. He said to me, “Who is this?”
“I left my car this morning, you said to call back in the afternoon”.
“Who are you?”
“My name is Eisenman.”
“Whayoosay- whoo is dis?”
“Eisenman, Eisenman- I left my car there this morning.”
“¿Quién es este? Yo no te entiendo”
“Eisenman, Eisenman…”
“Yo no te entiendo”
Finally in desperation I blurted out, “I’m the Jewish guy with the long red beard. I was here this morning!”
“Ah, Ahora entiendo! Your car is all ready”.
As I drove to pick up my car I realized that in this man’s mind I am defined as “the Jewish guy with the long red beard.” And for the purpose of fixing my car, that definition ‘works’. Meaning, he is not interested, nor is there any relevance for him ‘knowing’ me in any more serious way. The fact that I am defined in his eyes as “the Jewish guy with the long red beard” is all he needs to facilitate the details of our relationship.
For what he needs to make a living, his simplistic and totally superficial definition of me, is totally sufficient.
He needed to classify me in order to identify me.
The simple uncomplicated definition is what he needs to function.
The need to classify people into workable categories is a basic human necessity.
A first grade teacher must classify her students into reading groups based on their reading abilities.
A gym instructor must divide his charges into teams based on their gymnastic prowess.
A doctor in the triage unit must evaluate the medical needs of her patients based on their urgency and seriousness of their injuries.
For these and in many other instances the simplistic and uncomplicated definition of a human being and their attributes and or talents is very important and critical; and most importantly, required.
After all, a doctor in the emergency room who is treating a bleeding patient does not have the time to get to know the person; rather, he has to asses the medical condition of the patient based on what he sees at the time.
However, quite often, we use these simplistic definitions as a cop-out to arrive at convenient resolutions to issues when we really should not be quick to judge others.
Please allow me to elaborate.
The other day I quoted to someone a Torah thought from a great Rav.
The person quickly said, “Oh, that Rav is a member of that Chassidus so of course he would say such a Torah thought.”
The fellow had conveniently placed the Rav in a self-styled box which allowed the fellow to be able to understand why such a person would say such a Torah thought.
However, this can be very dangerous.
Too often when we hear an opinion in the name of the Rav or an individual who is affiliated with a certain yeshiva and/or movement who we don’t ‘hold from’, we conveniently feel able to dismiss the opinion as we all know that anything from that yeshiva or from that group is dismissible.
Sometimes we see someone and based on their head covering we feel confident in judging them and placing them in a self-contained category.
This convenience of packaging people into real or artificial categories may work well for the car mechanic and for the ER doctor. However, they can be and they are disastrous when dealing with people who we are commanded to love and help.
How tragic it is when many of us fail to mature beyond the level of the car mechanic in judging our fellow Jews.
How often do we say (or at least think) that so and so is just a ‘greasy yeshiva guy’ or is a wild ‘chassidishe fellow’ or a ‘wacky on fire baal-teshuva’- without ever getting to know the person?
These artificial and false representations are then used as excuses to allow us to validate to ourselves when we choose not to friendly to this Jew.
“Oh this person is just an off beat baal-teshuva, why should I be friends with him?”
“She is so yeshivash; I could never see myself being close to her!”
Unfortunately, when we pre-judge and classify others based on these superficial and incorrect outer trappings, we rob ourselves of getting to know another wonderful person and actually cause ourselves to violate many mitzvahs which are part of “V’Havta L’Reiacha” (loving your fellow man).
However, we must realize that when we judge other in such a superficial fashion, that is how Hashem will ultimately judge us.
Meaning, when we judge others based on the simplistic superficial things, Hashem will judge us in the same way.
How would I feel if Hashem would look at me as the “Jewish guy with the red beard”?
I would scream to Hashem, “There is so much more to me; please look into me deeper!”
How tragic would be if Hashem would answer, “You conveniently sized up this person as a wacky this or a nutty that, why should I not do the same to you?”
Remember, as the Sfas Emes said, when it says in the first chapter of Pirkei Avos: “and judge every man to the side of merit”, the Hebrew text reads “Es Kol Ha’Adam…” “(Judge) the entire man (kol Ha’Adam)”- before you can judge another man- you must see the ‘entire man’ for who he is.