The Short Vort
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The Short Vort- -“ Dear Chaim” (7/8/10)
The Short Vort
Good Morning!
Today is Thursday the 26th of Tammuz 5770 and July 8, 2010
Dear Chaim,
Chaim, yesterday we were all touched by your story, and of the unfortunate incident of your being rebuffed in your attempt to connect to Hashem and to Yiddishkeit.
However, as always, life is not so simple and in reality, life is quite complex.
Meaning, although I certainly feel for you Chaim, and I recognize and validate your feelings, which were unfairly hurt; nevertheless, Chaim, although you are only 15, you still has to know one important fact of life.
What is that?
People can and will be cruel.
People can and will say the most painful words at the worst possible times.
If we are looking for reasons not to observe Hashem’s Torah or for not doing what we should be doing, there will never be a lack of people to blame for our not doing what we should be doing.
I think I once mentioned to you (and if I did, this will be a good review; and if I didn’t then it is certainly worth hearing) a story about Rav Moshe Feinstein Zt”l when he was only eight years old.
Rav Moshe, who was already fluent in Tanach at eight years old, was pushed ahead into the Gemara class attended by boys four and five years older than he.
The first day of class, little Moishele was very excited at his initial exposure to the wonderful world of Gemara learning.
He opened his Gemara and the Rebbe announced, “Would anyone like to read?”
Little Moishele saw the first word of the Sugya (topic) they were learning and immediately recognized it as the name Itamar (Isamar) - the name of one of the son’s of Aharon- the brother of Moshe.
Little Moishele raised his little hand excitingly and asked if he could read.
The rebbe nodded his approval and little Moishele began in a loud voice, “Isamar…”
As if on queue, all of the older boys in the class exploded in galls of laughter and ridicule.
One of older boys corrected Moishele in a derision laden tone and then said the following:
color:navy">“Silly Moishele, the word is not the Hebrew proper noun Isamar- the name of one of the sons of Aharon- the word is the Aramaic word Itmar.
color:navy">It is not a Hebrew word; it is an Aramaic word which is spelled identically to the Hebrew name
color:navy">Isamar
color:navy">.
color:navy"> In Aramaic it is not a name at all. In Aramaic, it means, “And the Rabbis said…”
color:navy"> Little Moishele, you did not even know this simple Gemara word. Go back to the baby shiur where you belong!”
Rav Moshe would often look back on that incident as a watershed event of his life.
Basically he was faced with two different ways on how to react to the jeering sarcasm of his ‘friends’.
He could have run from the Cheider, jumped into bed, tossed away the Gemara and become a math professor at the University of Petersburg.
Imagine if he had done that.
Imagine how bereft we all would have been.
There would be no Yeshiva Tiferes Yerushalayim.
There would be no ‘Igros Moshe’ (the responsa of Rav Moshe which is a standard set of sefarim in every rabbi’s library all over the world).
There would be no Torah and inspiration from Rav Moshe Feinstein.
Perhaps even worse, there would be no Short Vort today!
Thank Hashem; Rav Moshe did not react to the ridicule and cruelty of his friends by abandoning his vision and his goal.
How did he react?
Rav Moshe himself tells us how he reacted.
Rav Moshe would say that he learned two important lessons from the incident which he constantly incorporated into his life’s conduct from that day onward.
- Never, never make fun of a person for their mistakes. Rav Moshe himself felt on his young skin the pain of a put down. He was a victim of sardonic and scornful insults. However, as opposed to running from life, he decided to improve life by accepting upon himself never to cause another human being the pain which he had suffered.
- Never think you know something for sure; even when you are sure. Rav Moshe would say later on that as he looked at the word Isamar in the Gemara, he was sure that it was the name of the son of Aharon. However, although the word was spelled exactly the same as Isamar, it was not the name Isamar! Rav Moshe gleaned from his pain an important lesson in humility. Never be too sure of yourself; even when you think you are sure of yourself.
I feel for you Chaim and for all the other Chaims in this world who have unfairly pained and hurt by silly and unthinking people.
However, the best antidote and the best piece of advice I can give you is the following:
It is easy to retreat to your room and play the ‘blame game’; especially since you have been scarred and hurt in an unfair and cruel manner.
However, remember that the best ‘revenge’ you can have on your tormentor is to take his abuse and turn it inside out.
Remember Rav Moshe.
Remember that you can do the same.
Take the abuse and turn it into a catalyst to become an even better person.
Chaim, if you stay away from Shul you have granted your abuser true power over you!
That victory he does not deserve!
Come back Chaim, come back.
Come back with your jeans and your tee-shirt; come back to Shul.
Come sit by me and together we will make sure to greet with a smile and warm handshake all of the Chaims who arrive at the Shul.
Please, just as Rav Moshe did not let Mr. Ridicule ruin his life, do not let Mr. Dress-code ruin your life.
Chaim, you have a choice.
You can stay in your bed and allow Mr. Dress-code to continue to have power over you; or you can get out of bed, come to shul and become a model for people who want to daven to Hashem!
Chaim, please, imagine how the world would be lacking without a Rav Moshe Feinstein?
I do not want to imagine how barren the world would be without you and without what you –and only you- have to offer the world.
Chaim come back.
I need you.
Your friend forever,
ron yitzchok eisenman